Mother Nature Needs a Midol.

What a B.

Looks like mother nature and I were both having a bad day yesterday. My wrath came out on my blog and a box of honey nut cheerios. Her wrath came out on Japan.

This morning I pranced into work from my workout, thrilled my prayers had been answered and the sun was shining, feeling slightly less dramatic and postal than the evening before and thrilled to be embarking on a workday with TGIF fever.

And then I heard the news that no amount of sunlight or vitamin D could brighten.  I am going to leave it to CNN to recap - and yes - the closeted wannabe broadcast journalist in me is jealous my name is not linked to this eloquent portrayal: 

Tokyo (CNN) -- The most powerful earthquake to hit Japan in recorded history struck off the island nation's shore on Friday, collapsing buildings, touching off widespread fires and unleashing walls of water up to 30 feet high. The waves swept across rice fields, engulfed towns, dragged houses onto highways, and tossed cars and boats like toys. Hundreds of people were dead and hundreds more missing. (http://www.cnn.com/2011/WORLD/asiapcf/03/11/japan.quake/index.html?hpt=T1&iref=BN1)

I have been thinking a lot about this today. How insane and incomprehensible the stories, pictures and numbers are. How, despite every peace treaty, bill, agreement, pact, or prayer made in this world there are unpredictable forces that can sweep away the entire livelihood and societal structure of a community. It doesn't take a terrorist or a calculated plot. Destruction like that can just happen naturally. Meanwhile I was performing some very unnatural movements in a boot camp class led by my new favorite Brazilian instructor telling me in a heavy accent to do 25 more as Ricky Martin blared in the background. ("DO YOU REALLY WANT IT..!!" No Ricky. The answer is no).

This could be my Altima "Bella"'s brothers and sisters.

My coworker just showed me this picture of the Nissan Loading dock in Yokohama and the hundreds of cars that collided into each other in the wake of the wave. That is simply one snap shot of the tragic fallout. One snap shot of a country's breaking heart. This does not take into account the millions of hearts that break because of man-made ignorance, hatred and hunger for power. It is disturbing. Quite honestly the earth quake may not have hit Tennessee, but it still found a way to shake my core and remind me of the fact that this life and all the "stuff" we treasure is so temporary. It is scary to think in terms of an end, but sometimes it takes catastrophes like this to remind me of how precious the time we have is. It is not about the new car (sorry Bella) or the suede coat - it is about the people in our lives. It is about faith and God and love (kumbaya).

At 22 years old the world is often compressed down to only the things spinning in my world. Let's be honest. This blog is the purest example of how me-centered I am right now in my life. I realize as a single girl in her twenties this is to be expected, but when the only time I am tuning into the news is when I happen upon it in the lobby of my office building on my way to the bathroom (and yet I have facebook pulled up every hour on the hour) I start to wonder if I am too out of touch for my own good. I want to educate myself more because the truth is, knowledge is power (a cheesy shout out to the posters plastered on the walls of school libraries of Condoleezza Rice holding a book). And bottom line, if the world is coming to an end, I want to know about it. 

So with that being said, in addition to praying for a happy, balanced, less hostile Mother Nature - I am going to request she lay off for another century so I can live out my life.

The Top 10 reasons I would really appreciate the world NOT coming to an end:

What was she thinking.... seriously.

1. I have a very specific peaceful-old-lady-alseep-in-my-bed death wish that does not include natural disasters or Mayan calendar predictions coming true. Picture a combination of the final scene of the movie Titanic (minus the diamond dropping - girlfriend was bonkers for not passing that rock down to her unfortunate looking grand daughter who need a brush among other things) with the ending of The Notebook (Referencing the epic romance - not the degenerative disorder and the nursing home). 

2. My favorite book by my favorite author (and BFF Emily Giffin) is being turned into a movie and I cannot wait to see it come to life on screen. Best. Trailer. Ever.

3. I want the chance to meet my Jake/Jude/John K./Prince Charming hybrid husband and die beside him (see number 1).

My face is somewhere in that mess. Off spring must see this.

4.  I want to take my children to Disney World. I particularly want to show them the ugly picture plaque my sister and I had made when we were tweens that the magic of Mickey plastered on marble rocks in the entrance of Epcot. N'Sync did it too. Don't judge.

5. I haven't seen the season finale of Oprah yet. Or American Idol. And even though Reality Steve thinks he is right this time, I want hard core proof of who the Bachelor picks. This is serious business.

6. I don't want the rain to come back so soon. And in every movie where the world comes to an end, it is raining. So - no thanks.

7. I want to see Justin Bieber grow old... and bald. And see how he and his fan base copes.

8. Speaking of bald - I want to see if Britney's hair ever grows back normally again.

9.  Justin Timberlake is now available. I would like a fair shot, thank you. This may take time. Can't hurry love.

And the final reason I do not want the world to come to an end:

10. There is no proof that there is cheese in heaven.

Dear Mother Nature - Thank you in advance for taking this into consideration. Now, go take a midol and eat some chocolate, because you are pissing me off.