Carolina Beach Part 1: Donuts, cabanas and shin shields

Carolina Beach - photo credit Alisa :)

For Memorial day weekend Weston and I planned a trip to his grandparents adorable beach house in Carolina Beach with his parents, Teresa and David and close friends Jim and Alisa. The trip also included special guest appearances by my parents Dawn and Don and Weston's Aunt Kris and Uncle Dewayne and it was such a memorable and relaxing getaway. And so as I sit here with a significant dose of PBD - post beach depression - I am going to narrate you through the highlights. 

Weston and I arrived in Raleigh late Thursday night and his parents and my favorite little chihuahua Coco picked us up for the two hour drive to the beach house. We got there at about 2am, but I quickly woke from my coma as I walked through the front door. It is truly beautiful - so warm and inviting, just big enough to fit everyone, but still very cozy and charming. What a great location too - just a short walk from the sand and only a half mile walk to the boardwalk which is sprinkled with Carnival rides, seafood restaurants, dive bars, an awesome fishing pier and the best donut experience of my life.

An actual Britt's Donut - crack

Let's really bite into that donut comment (pun intended). I am not a huge donut person. Not even the Krispy Kreme hot light really does it for me. Will I eat donuts? - of course. But there's not a whole lot of sugar confections I wouldn't eat, so that's not saying much. But then I had a Britt's Donut - the #2 donut in the nation, and I became a born again donut-enthusiast. This crispy on the outside, warm and doughy on the inside, perfect ring of heaven is truly a dream. Unlike a Krispy Kreme they don't have that overly sugary after-taste - instead they perfectly frost the golden brown surface and with one bite the initial crunch melts in your mouth. Which might explain why I justified having literally 7 donuts during the span of the trip. But I could have totally Man v. Food 3 dozen with a smile. Britt's donuts should definitely be on everyone's bucket list, sweet tooth or not. It was a divine experience that I am woofing off at the gym every day this week. Good times, but so worth it.

Go get a snack - we both know your mouth is watering.

Okay - now that you are munching, let's continue with a less salivating topic - the weather! Despite an iffy forecast, the sun was shining the entire trip - not one drop of rain, which is a miracle at the beach, especially when a tropical storm is on the brink. The temperature was truly perfect - not too hot, not too cold, and just the right amount of wind. Okay - the wind was in fact questionable for a few reasons:

David's thoughts: Hm, that's one mighty birthmark

1. On the first day, the wind was a sunburn's most trusted accomplice, masking me from feeling any heat, and therefore allowing the sun to scorch me without notice until I stepped inside. And what did I find? That I accidentally neglected to sunscreen one very large bizarre section of my shin that ended up resulting in a self-diagnosed second-degree tomato-red burn pattern. David noticed this on the beach but thought I had one of those large birth marks and didn't want to comment - awesome. And so I had a cameo style burn pattern all down my right shin on the first day and had to fashion a "shin guard" and wear SPF 70 for the rest of the trip when exposed to the sun.

2. On the second day, the wind whipped up the sand like a dessert storm and laying out on the beach was kind of like being at war. I stayed out with my shin guard for a bit, but shortly after decided the sand attack was not worth the burn I was bound to get since the older I get the less I tan. And because the sun felt like a red hot on my shin.

3. We tried to put up a cabana on the first day for shade - which would have really helped prevent the "birthmark" situation. But the cabana was was pretty much on it's last leg to begin with and the wind did not help matters. By the end of the second day it slowly collapsed until we decided to abandon it completely and leave it on the beach as an ornament for all to envy.

But it didn't rain! So overall, hallelujah to that.

More tomorrow for Part 2 which will include stories of the parents meeting, as well as my first fishing experience on the pier! And I might talk about the donuts again, because they are just that remarkable.

A new curse word trends across the nation: "Compromise."

This is worse than Fish Stick's hair. Which is saying a lot.

I capped off an amazing beach weekend (a new post to come on that tomorrow) with the only program that could have fought off the Post Beach Depression - The Bachelorette. In an Emily world, this morning would have also been rosy, as I would have been greeted looking naturally stunning by a calorie-free breakfast in bed made by my mama. Needless to say, my world, is not an Emily world - I woke up looking like hell woofing through my spin class to fight off the 15 donuts I had this past weekend from the amazing donut crack shack, Britts Donuts - more on all of this later.

There were a lot of memorable moments and observations from last night's show. The first that comes to mind is the unique haircuts adorned by some of these guys. Ryan has rooster hair (and by the way - is becoming more and more of a douche bag with every date). Pony Tail dude - which is what I have named him since I don't know his name and I have not seen him speak one word since his initial introduction - wears a pony tail. And let's not forget the muffled-hybrid-accent tool bag Alessandro who looks like he tried to mimic the 90's boy-band trend using petroleum jelly and a cereal bowl.

Emily: I might throw up on you in a minute.

Emily's date with Chris certainly had some highlights. He was very "excited," which must explain why he used that word about 15 times on their awkward "small talk" stroll to the large building they were about to climb. Yes, I'm sure "Emily looks amazing in a harness." The camel toe crotch and look of fear is very becoming. Not to mention, this guy must have a spiderman fantasy to think scaling a wall in a thunderstorm and watching a woman become petrified is hot. Forget a kiss, he was just lucky she didn't vomit at the top, is all I'm saying.

The date ended with Chris's more attractive twin brother Luke Bryan making his speakers go "boom boom" and then finishing the night off serenading the couple with a break-up song about love gone crusty. A perfect melody to form their "truly meaningful connection" to. And let's please not forget the entrance of the bizarrely timed "flash mob" of rhythmically challenged dancers joining in. It was the most "romantic date in all of bachelor history..." Almost as romantic as Tony's time with Kermit last week.

"Do you miss daddy waddy too buddy boo boo?!" Son: No.

Speaking of Tony. Sweet, sweet, cry baby Tony. Emily sure found an "honorable" out with that one. Tony was not getting a rose that night regardless, but she played the "I'm a mommy too" card so well that I am not sure he actually knew he was being dumped. Suddenly she is walking him out, and he is slightly confused, but at the same time, just thrilled to be able to use his baby voice all the time once reunited with his son. Well played, Emily.

Back-tracking to the guys meeting Emily's friends in the park, we finally started to see some true colors peak from the prince charming facades. Ryan (rooster hair) is such a chauvinistic show-off. Not a fan. Note to all men: do not, under any circumstances tell a woman you are trying to court that you will love her less if she let's herself go and gets fat. In fact, don't tell any woman on the planet that. Ever.

Having Emily's friends grill the guys was an interesting twist, except that I'm not sure Emily thought her friends would be coming onto the guys at the same time - that Wendy was frisky and freaky. I will say, I fell in love with Sean during this date. He is now one of my top runners for the win. Genuine, kind, sweet, faithful and a p90x body. Love him.

Me and Weston in Dollywood.

Emily's date with Arie in Dollywood immediately made me turn to Weston and beg him to go there with me. It looks very magical. Weston laughed at me. Anyways, I digress - Arie is the perfect mix of good looks, sophistication and understated charm. Their date felt natural and organic, their slow dance music by Dolly was appropriately romantic and lacking "boom boom." I really liked how he actually questioned her on what happened with Brad (about time some real conversations were had). He says everything right without being a show off, but I can't shake the feeling that something is off (and I don't just mean with his un-whitened teeth). Serious relationship with a woman with two kids sits a little funny... I cannot put my finger on it, but I feel like Arie might have a secret... something is too good to be true. 

Booted before he could bust out the Cha Cha slide. Sad.

And of course - the rose ceremony. Never before has the word "compromise" been used so often as a way of saying "f*ck you" in a conversation - yes, Alessandro - the 90's-hair-wannabe, creepy-accent, grain merchant needed to go.

But what made me mad was that Kalon also should have been kicked out by the same principle when he told Emily to stop talking and that he wanted his first child to be his own. He seems like a sociopath. Not sure why Emily kept him around - maybe she wanted to borrow his lip smackers for one more week.

I loved the sweet moment between Arie and Emily when she needed some consoling and I cannot wait for Ryan to bury himself next week with his immature and macho reaction to seeing them kiss. Dear Rooster - have you not watched this show before? People kiss. Get over it.

Eggs were smashed, Alejandro was saved for multi-cultural purposes yet again, and the jumping bean Stevie got the axe. [Side note - the way Emily asks if the guys will "accept this rose" is weird. And the way she says "Charlie." Listen for it. It's a little "princess robot" if you ask me].

My front runners are Sean, Arie and Jef (despite my dislike for the one "f") - which is a true guess since for the first time in Bachelor history I promised Weston I would not read Reality Steve so "we could be surprised" (his shared love [which he would probably consider more a "compromise"] of this series is a big part of why I love him. I'm sure the Emily eye-candy helps to tune him in too).

Until next week friends...

From the Muppets to the interrogation room

EXPLAIN YOURSELF!

In this kid-themed season of the Bachelorette featuring soccer practice and the Muppets, is it just me, or did Barbie go into full pressure mode way too soon? While I can accept that this is an unrealistic 8-week dating period, speeding up the "get to know you process," Emily was in rare form last night for first date behavior. If in the real world someone on a first date jumped into questions like, "Where do you see yourself in five years?" and dumped you upon your genuine response, there would be no relationships to speak of.

All I can say, is poor Joe. When he responds on their fantastical date at the West Virginia Greenbrier resort that he sees himself being happy and fulfilled - Emily shuts him down. Apparently, this is not a good enough answer to "fit into her life." She probes further. Lights dim. Cameras zoom.

Emily sternly: "Well what does that look like? What does that even mean?!"

I am an Emily fan, don't get me wrong, but girl has to chill at least until she has narrowed down the guy pool a bit more - you know, cut out the crazies. She couldn't have saved Joe and ditched one of the Alessandro's who we know are only being kept on for their multicultural status? Or the obnoxious MC who looks like a hobbit?  I think Joe was simply trying to deviate from the spoon-fed answer of - "well Emily, in five years I want to be married to you with four babies, coaching Ricki how to be a soccer star, cooking you dinner, winning the lottery and flying you to private islands on our jet plane that I will name The Emily." I respect him for that. I mean it's the FIRST DATE.

And while Emily was shape-shifting into an FBI agent, most of the guys were turning into Gaston versions of human, which if I were Emily I would just see right through. I am all about men being gentlemen but there is fine line between being kind and being a fake prince charming.

"Can I please take your hand?" (Can I please throw up. It's a hand. Just take it - Does this not remind you of Brad who practically asked the women permission to breathe?)

"I LOVE THE MUPPETS!"

"I liked you best in your mom clothes" (aka her Neiman Marcus top and designer jeans).

"I've been tossing and turning in my top bunk bed thinking of you."

"I'm going to wear as much lip gloss as possible so that you can't stop starring at my mouth," (okay Kalon didn't say the last one, but he has to be thinking it. Unless he has some chapped-lip disease he has to medicate, I will never quite understand the lip smackers action).

Couple of highlights we must talk about -

The Letter: No need to interrogate Ryan since he poured out his premature bull crap wrapped with words like "dreams," "best intentions" and "amazing," in a 25 page hand written letter. If I got that kind of letter after my first date with a man, I would run for the hills. Too much, too soon.

The Muppets: Tony and Kermit really shared a true rainbow connection, don't you think? He was so jazzed about spending time with yours and my favorite green puppet, and then tied it back to his son instead of just admitting he has a clear fetish for stuffed friends.

Emily's dancing: I did find her stiff hip popping slightly rhythmically challenged, but let's be honest - Barbie would look gorgeous rolling in dog poop. 

The guy's names: From Jef with one "f" (who I actually think is playing this all right - being quiet and shy) to the "Wolf" to Arie (who I also really like) - I have a feeling these guys either needed to have a unique name, a child, a head injury, or wear inordinate amounts of lip gloss to be cast on the show. Note to self - drop an "n" on the application. Or maybe throw in a silent "z." Jenzy it is.

The crying: Emily is already crying and it is only the first real episode of dating. I think we should buy some ponchos for this season since I have a feeling that is not the last of the water works we will be seeing.

Next week Emily get's even more feisty throwing eggs and maybe even ripping off bobble heads.
Can't wait.

Carolina sandwich

Yes that is my mom. Nope, not my sister.

They say home is where the heart is, and I must admit, going back home to NC for Mother's day weekend to visit my mom completely proved that being in Cary will always feel like home. I do love Nashville and plan to be here for a while, but having family dinners with my two best gals (Lynnie made the trip from Boston too) was so much fun and something I wish wasn't a plane ride away. Of course, we had amazing meals because that is oftentimes the best part of coming together - a family oriented excuse to eat our faces off. From Italian nachos, to a very fancy dinner at Ruth Chris (with the most fluffy amazing butter I have ever had in my life), to home cooked lobster and clams to cheese, cheese and more cheese, including my mama's famous grilled cheese - which is to die for - let's just say we were definitely well fed.

In between all the eating, we also found time to go through mom's closet and completely overhaul everything we thought was dated or just plain ugly What Not to Wear style, and then treated her to a shopping spree. It was so much fun laughing together, watching home videos and drinking wine. There was nothing I would change, other than all the calories I consumed - but we weren't allowed to speak of that all weekend without putting a dollar in a jar - seriously. No commenting on fat, calories, feeling like a bloaty whale etc. Try that sometime - ladies, it is tough. So I figured I would get that out of my system here and now - let's just say I felt like I was waddling onto the plane last Monday morning.

The view at the Marina in Old Hickory

This passed weekend Weston and I may not have left the state of TN but boy did we travel. Saturday morning we went shopping in Madison for our upcoming beach weekend, followed by a lunch at the Marina in Old Hickory to enjoy the beautiful weather, and our favorite hickory smoked wings. Later that night after getting dolled up we went to downtown Franklin for a surprise party for a good friend of mine which had a speak-easy vibe in this secluded Piano loft which is actually the Yamaha company office. The location overlooks the idyllic Franklin town square, which yes - is featured in the Hannah Montana movie :). There were cheese plates for days, and an elaborate menu of top shelf specialty drinks.

Sunday we decided to be adventurous and after a filling brunch at one of our favorite hole-in-the wall eateries Biscuit House in East Nashville we drove all the way passed my house in Bellevue up to Kingston Springs to canoe 5 miles down the Harpeth River. Then back to Old Hickory for dinner at Cinco De Mayo and what is becoming our traditional Sunday evening Friday Night Lights marathon. If you know Middle TN at all, you know the miles we put on our cars this weekend is just shy of the calories I consumed on Mother's day.

Next weekend it is back to North Carolina for the much anticipated Jenny & Weston Carolina Beach Weekend. I am so looking forward to some time off on the beach with his parents and friends, and the best part is my parents are also coming up for a day from Cary. Should be another great weekend traveling back home to our families, games, wine, beach waves and of course, I'm bringing the cheese.

From Carolina to Tennessee, back to Carolina we go. No two other places I'd rather be.

(But of course not without first posting a Bachelorette update. Counting down to tonight's episode for sure! Stay tuned for an update!)

How to make a bad impression - helicopters, eggs, and bobble heads.

First impressions are such an interesting moment in time. I remember when I first met Weston - we were at a kind of shady bar in town (real classy kids) and he was dressed in a pink shirt and a vest I haven't seen him wear since. Without going into all of the details, let's just say within the first five minutes of talking, he was inviting me to dinner with him and his boss and his boss's wife. Yep. A little forward. Turns out, his boss is actually his cousin and therefore it was not nearly as weird of an ask as I thought at the time. And no, his cousin did not join us on our first date... which is why the rest is history, over a year later. But based on that first meeting, I didn't walk out of that bar thinking - I just met my future boyfriend. I was instead thinking - I wish I liked my boss as much as that kid does...

Which is why the first episode of the Bachelorette is ALWAYS such a treat. First meetings are usually awkward, especially when televised. "Who is going to make a complete tool of themselves?" you wonder, with giddy anticipation. And every time it is about 95% of the guys, which makes for a fun two hours of TV. I thought I would recap my thoughts on this one by talking about what NOT to do while trying to make a good first impression, if, in an alternate universe I was Emily, the Bachelorette (and looked like her too.. :)

1. Do not, under any circumstances, speak in another language within the first three minutes of introducing yourself. You may think its sexy, but I have no idea what you're saying and I'm feeling stupid at the same time for not being all multi-cultural. Dora was after my time. So as you roll your tongue, I'm rolling my eyes.

2. If you are going to bring me a glass slipper and place it on my foot, bring two. What am I going to do with one glass slipper other than limp?! And make sure its a size 11 since my feet are massive. (I'm sure Emily has sweet, perfect, little angel feet - so this might not be relevant - but let's pretend she's Big Foot like me for fun). 

Just one?

3. I am more than my beauty - while I do look ah-mazing, talk to me about something other than how you are speechless and in awe of my beauty. Find the words. You have circled the mansion for three hours until the producers have finally released you to meet me. And as previously discussed, make sure those words are in English.

4. Let's hug just once - there is no reason to bear hug me in between every word you speak. I'm happy you're here too. But we just met and you were too speechless to speak / did not speak in my language / you're in shock over how pretty I am - so I think one hug is all you have earned.

Asking to borrow his lip gloss.

5. Yes, I am a single mom, and I do love my love-child daughter. But don't open with some BS about how you think the most attractive part about me is that I'm a mom. I look like a Barbie, so let's be honest - if the most attractive part of this bombshell situation is that I pushed a baby out of my who-hah, then we are truly not on this planet anymore.

6. Skate boards, helicopters and other non-conventional ways of making your entrance are over the top and simply not necessary. Especially the helicopter. Talk about napoleon complex - if you need a flying machine to make an impression, you must be hiding some other inadequacies... and the wind is going to mess up my hair, so overall its just not worth it.

7. Admit to what you really do - Mr. "Luxury Brand Expert" - please... you probably spray cologne at the Nordstrom and live off your daddy's trust fund. Figures you'd be the one to wear lip gloss and enter in the helicopter....

8. Do not make enemies on the first night - the little leprechaun dressed in green who was making a fuss already played the game all wrong. The first impression rose went to the sweet single dad who had his kid write a letter to Emily.... take notes - sweet wins over sour every time.

This is not cheese and therefore not okay.

9. Symbolism of any kind, is just as bad as the helicopter. Telling me, while you grope a large egg, that it represents how you will protect me and my daughter is just plain strange. And if you are going to go that route, just bring me a cheese tray and tell me I am just as awesome and wonderous as the cheese on the plate. The only form of acceptable symbolism must involve cheese, that you leave with me to consume in private.

Did this really happen?

10. Don't make me a bobble head and ask me to play dolls. Or dress up as a grandma. How many times have you seen the winner playback video of the couple's journey start with either of those things - never. Enough said.

It should be an interesting season friends. I hope for Emily's sake some of these guys can turn it around. I do like Arie, and of course the Nashvillian, Charlie. Those are my top two contenders for now - sweet, calm, good looking. Just like my Weston turned out to be :)

Dear Fish Stick: Time to see how it's done.

Definitely not a fish stick.

So as many of you know, or should know since it is practically a national holiday in my book, another compelling chapter of the Bachelor empire premieres this Monday, May 14th starring Bachelorette Emily Maynard. The anticipation is killing me. I have butterflies of happiness dancing inside my tummy just waiting to watch this season unfold. Trust me, just based on the commercials, it is already better than Fish Stick's season - not hard to be. And needless to say, the girl already has won over my heart for owning a brush and being a picturesque example of hair care maintenance.

This blog will of course, chronicle my thoughts on the season - maybe not every episode, but I will do my best to keep you all informed on my perceptions of Emily's most romantic journey leading to the most dramatic rose ceremony yet.

As apart of my "daily countdown to the premiere" ritual (which includes, but is not limited to - checking spoiler sites, fan blogs, and facebook for updates, followed by sniffing a rose a day, and wearing bachelorette party hats and sashes) I thought I would blog about the top five things I am most excited about for this season. Let's begin, in no particular order:

Little Ricki and the single mom.

1. We are going from Fish Stick to Barbie - and who wouldn't want to watch Barbie find love? Emily Maynard is beautiful, has teeth that look like white chick-let gum pieces, is sweet and a single mom - but more than all of that - she is from Charlotte, NC - which makes her that much more awesome. I am very excited to get to see her real personality and of course, her wardrobe, as the season unfolds.

2. The first few episodes take place in Emily's hometown, Charlotte and as an NC native (Yes, I pretend those 15 years in CT didn't truly raise me like my NC years did, which is why I am allowed to say y'all without judgement) I am really looking forward to the charming NC scenery and nostalgia.

3. I found Emily's daughter to be quite interesting and rebellious in Emily's season being on the Bachelor, so it will be fun to see how the child takes the camera action this time around.

Gotta love those baby blues and soothing voice.

4. I plan on taking a drink every time they make a love metaphor, say the word "amazing," "vulnerable," "you know" or talk about her being a single mom - good times.

5. And while I said no particular order, how could I not be most excited that Chris Harrison is now single ladies! He is not eye-candy per say, but how could you not love his empathetic approach to the real amazing love that is created in these 8 weeks of lala land?! How. Could. You. Not?! 

My hopeful prediction - Brad Womack comes back at some point with his therapist to find closure. PLEASE LET THIS HAPPEN.
It is going to be a great ride...

Getting adjusted

We have a new home. But I have no pics of it. So this'll do.

The A Group recently moved into a new office and while it is beautiful, a great location and I have my own office, there are a few "adjustments" I have been coping with that I wanted to share with all of you:

Oh so happily on my dino phone.

1. My phone in the old office was a dinosaur, only had three lines, and didn't have a visible caller ID (aka, it probably had someone else's ear wax in the handle - we are talking old). But I knew how it worked, I understood it, and I dominated it. I befriended it, despite its inadequacies. It's kinda like what I do with canned cheese whiz. But these new, practically robot phones have me a little thrown. I accidentally hung up on a client two different times trying to turn up the volume. It talks to me, it has 15 million buttons. I think it might be able to save the planet. So in addition to learning how to check voice mail, I should probably figure out how it does that too.

2. As you all know, in the old office I had a specific stall in the bathroom that I always used and kind of grew to befriend, like my dinosaur phone. And while I do love the full length mirror in the new bathroom, the toilets here don't flush automatically and I have to wave for the dispenser to sense me and provide a paper towel. You would think this would not be a big deal - just a few extra steps in the powder room process, but I have gotten so used to simply standing up and walking away, that I am forgetting to flush altogether, or being the awkward girl who, while washing her hands, trying to wave for a paper towel, who then remembers she forgot to flush and runs back into the stall for the final swosh. TMI? Too bad.

My favorite work snack.

3. I am farther away from the kitchen and therefore my snacking cannot simply be excused as a wander to get a tissue, or a chat with someone else I hear getting water, and then, whoops, I stumbled upon a cheese stick. It has to be an intentional choice, which makes me feel more calorically (copyright - jenny original word since spell check does not recognize it) responsible.

4. We have a different UPS guy and I kind of miss my loud friend commenting on the smells coming from the microwave and after two years, asking me my last name. Bitter sweet letting go of that one.

5. There are a lot of glass walls and I have this terrible fear that I am going to run into one and have the bloody nose that runs for days. So I am now reaching through open spaces to make sure, there is not glass there, in turn making me look like a mime or a modern dancer in the work place, when I typically like to save those looks for the living room.

So that is what I have been up to friends. Adjusting.

Don't worry the Bachelorette premieres next week and all funny and entertainment will be restored to the blog - cannot wait.