Battle Scars from the Other Side

My dear friend, Andrew, a successful 25-year-old who runs a non-profit here in Nashville, recently read my post describing my impressions of the men found on the dating app, Tinder. 

In that post I invite any man to rebuttal with his experience dealing with us ladies. Over the Thanksgiving holiday I received this gem in my email box and with his blessing, I am excited to share with all of you his thoughts from the other side.

So without further ado - here is Andrew's take on being a man navigating the online dating world in a little list he'd like to call: Love Truly Is a Battlefield - And Ducks Don't Make it Out Alive.

The only duck face allowed.

Alright ladies.

 1. First question to ask yourself when posting a picture on the internet is: Am I or was I ever at some point in my life a duck? If the answer is no then please put the duck face pictures in the deleted items folder. If the answer is yes then please add that into your bio as a disclaimer. We deserve to know that truth up front. To return the favor we men promise to retire our most interesting man in the world references. It's a give & take ladies. We'll play if you do too.



2. You have one chance to put your best foot forward. If that first pic is any of the following: mirror selfie, gym selfie, or any selfie I am 99% inclined to hate you. I don't believe you have friends to take pictures of you to cherish the memory which leads me to further believe that you're probably a terrible person who supports genocide.



This is crap - I don't want to play.

Disclaimer: Too many group pictures makes every guy ask WHICH ONE ARE YOU?! Are you the cute one who looks like she owns a small business or the chick in the bra giving peace signs at the trailer park? WE DONT KNOW! Why are the two of you even friends anyway? Society wants to know.


3. Have a sense of humor! Please have something in your bio/tagline that reveals more than the fact that you're a "southern girl at heart" and that you "Love Jesus, food and friends." I have NOTHING to interact with you about if we "match." Nobody wants to send or receive a message that says "Hey I like friends too" or "The South is really great."



Disclaimer: You can't get mad if you receive a message like that either! Online interaction is awkward and if you don't offer up something worthwhile to talk about you can't expect us to either. Toss out something funny or unique in your bio. A movie or TV reference is perfect!

Charles Manson - Not my friend Andrew

4. Don't expect a guy to do all the work here. Chivalry is great in person but a NORMAL message from a girl is nice every once in a while. Use the common friends or interests as a nice breaker and toss out a hello. This stuff doesn't have to be weird unless you're into that sort of thing. If so, disregard all of this. Creep away.

5. On second thought, this is all probably too weird anyway. Just meet me at the bar. I promise I'm not going to Charles Manson you.

Preach! I hope this sheds some light on how we ladies might need to portray ourselves a little differently. I know I definitely edited out my selfie collage... (Yes. That is a joke, people). Thank you to Andrew for his candid contribution. Until next time friends, swipe right at your own risk!