I just began the sentence of this entry 15 times. I am not sure exactly what I want to say tonight as I sit in my bed just shy of 24 hours from the last time I wrote. I think sometimes the most interesting part of writing is figuring out where to start.
For tonight, seeing as I simply do not have the energy to begin with anything profound, why don't we start with the obvious - breakfast.
This morning I woke up in my beautiful chocolate brown room enveloped by my brand new comforter and slightly stiff sheet set (definitely should have washed them before putting them on the bed) eager to get dressed and FINALLY see my best friend in the whole wide world. M and I have been best friends for years now and I am not sure how I got by before her. Who was there to help me pack strategically? Who was there to make me feel funny and thoughtful even in those moments that I know I was neither? My sister of course, but that goes without saying. M is the first person to believe in me whole heartedly with absolutely no familial obligation to. And so yes, my love life tends to be stagnant and I may not have everything figured out, but like the skim milk and splenda in my morning coffee (don't judge, it's healthiest that way), we are a perfect pair, which makes everything else feel all right. In fact, I think I intentionally blacked out most of my social adolescence until she came along and reminded me what it means to have a true friend - to have someone care about you the exact same way you care about them, and unconditionally no less.
Anyways, I digress in a kind of hallmark-like and cheesy way, so let's get back to breakfast.
M was in Dubai visiting her parents for two weeks - actually quite a short trip in comparison to my three month sabbatical in Europe last year, but it felt like a very long time. I think it is always harder to be the one left behind. Your "normal" life just is not quite normal without that person. Meanwhile they are off experiencing everything but normal - a true adventure. Over pancakes at IHop, my "normal" felt restored. We shared stories and gushed over crushes and little things we had to store in our minds like chipmunks storing nuts until we could finally spill to each other when only a diner table separated us, instead of an ocean. There is such an ease I feel being in her company. Like nothing in the world could hurt me so long as she is my friend. I think that is the most unique and rare thing to find in a person unrelated to you. I cherish it even more than than I could the largest chocolate chip pancake in the world and equal to the amount that I love grilled cheese sandwiches in Disney World on Christmas eve. This, in case you are not aware, is huge.
After breakfast my Poppy, Don and I went to the Nissan car dealership to pick out my new car. It is so surreal and sometimes I hate myself for not remembering just how lucky I am to be getting a new car, among so many other things I have in my life. I was so wrapped up in which color to choose and which interior would look best, that in the end I just wanted to slap myself, and once my slapped former self came to, remind her that she is absolutely blessed to have a grandfather that is going to buy her a car in the first place. Even if it were the color of cow poop, that would still be the most incredible gift. And I don't say this to be sappy or sentimental. I say it because it is true. And by writing it down, it helps me put everything in perspective.
I decided on a dark cranberry color because I love the blonde leather, and my exterior color options were limited by that preference. But as I said, driving a brand new 2010 car off the lot is going to be awesome. Now that all of the research and slight anxiety over the whole debacle has paid off (by my grandfather no less, but you know what I mean), I can rest easy, wake up, have breakfast of course, and then drive off into the morning sun in the utmost classy and sheek ride.
I also got to reunite with my sister today who came home from Greensboro, which means Christmas can officially begin. The truth is, since being home, I have lost a little of that Christmasy feeling. Not to say that finals, and studying (while some aspects of that did have it perks ;) was a joy, but I think the closer it gets the more I wish everything would just slow down so I have time to stop and remember to really feel it all - my last Christmas as a kid.
And yet, I walk into the house and it smells like fresh pine. The warm lighting from the Christmas tree paired with the endless marathons of Christmas movies and shows on television should certainly ignite that nostalgic and warm feeling inside. But that flame that used to burst alive this time of year when I was a kid (almost so much so that the fire department would have to be on high alert) has quieted to a small flicker, and I am not sure why. Maybe not enough Christmas music or claymations. Maybe, given the fact I almost lit my hair on fire by my own birthday cake just weeks ago, it is for the best. Maybe the implications of entering the new year make me more nervous than I would like to let on. And maybe tomorrow I will wake up and feel completely differently. Isn't that the beauty of being human - one good nights sleep can change everything you feel.
And this nights sleep is sure to be nothing short of heavenly since my head will be nestled by a brand new tempurpedic pillow to replace the one I have had for 10 years and was probably growing mold. Mama, my head and overall health thank you. I know what you are thinking. New car. New pillow. Next this girl is going to tell us she just won the North Carolina lottery or something. No - that would be my sister. Well kind of. Her advertising firm just landed the NC Lottery as their client and I am so excited and proud of her. Her hallmark-like cheesy monologue will simply have to wait for another entry as my eyes are beginning to fight my typing fingers.
Ironically, after just two days of beginning my blog again, the family closed out the night by watching "Julie and Julia" - a story of a modern woman cooking her way through Julia Child's cook book and blogging about it (on blogspot no less) about her adventures. It was such a great movie and inspired me to try to make this blog great (and I have spent the majority of this entry rambling... great start, I know). While my blog has slightly less of a purpose and a timeline, I hope someone reads it, even if that someone is just my mom who I might as well tell this all to over a glass of wine (which I have acquired quite the taste for since turning 21 I must say - and no, this will not turn into the diary of a young alcoholic. Do not worry). But who knows. I guess the moral in the movie is that the possibilities are endless, so long as you set your mind to a goal. And yet another moral was that every great mind needs brain food. So make sure you start your day with breakfast. And if you can pair your pancake with a best friend, you will be even more prepared for greatness.
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