Mind over matter.

Mind. Blown.

I watched the marathon this weekend with some friends on a balcony overlooking the ten mile mark. With mimosas in hands, we stood there, absolutely amazed by the determination and will of the endless stream of runners as they turned the corner at the top of the Gulch, pouring into the street for hours. Some were coasting along, throwing their arms in the air. Others were pushing strollers, supporting causes. There were tutus and capes and even courageous people powering through injuries they must have encountered miles before. The sheer flood of energy and unity (potentially heightened by my intake of alcohol before 10:00 a.m.) made for an extremely emotional experience.

Standing on that balcony in our sweatpants, having just feasted on pancakes, we couldn't help but laugh at the dichotomy between us and the runners busting their butts below. We talked about how we would never survive a half, let alone a full marathon. "I am a swimmer, not a runner." "I would literally die at mile three!" "They would have to pick me up out of the fetal position and carry me across the finish line." "I just don't know how these runners are functioning." "I have bad knees." Okay fine, all of these comments might have come from me - but everyone agreed - it seemed a task unimaginable for us mimosa-professionals to endure.

And that is when one of our more wise friends chimed in - "It is all mind over matter... You could do it, if you just set your mind to it." Immediately, all of my rebuttals rose to the surface - "but... SWIMMER.....no way.... not me....FETAL POSITION." But before my usual excuses could come out of my mouth, I stopped, looked down and considered it.... Then I had another mimosa.

But I've been thinking a lot this week about that idea - mind over matter - particularly on mile 1.5 on the treadmill last night when feeling as if my will to live was slowly sinking into oblivion as I pounded the belt. Do our minds really have the power to control our physical reaction to challenging situations? Could I really run 13.1 miles (with the proper training, despite my "swimmer" identity?) And does this apply to all areas of life?

I'm sorry.... but you're wrong.

I believe that it does, but to see it truly take shape in a positive way, we have to first re-frame our thoughts and re-program all of the resistance we put on ourselves through doubt and fear. All of those beliefs I have about "not being a runner" are true because I believe them to be true - and therefore my body has a very negative (on the verge of hostile) physical reaction to running. But what if I changed my thoughts? Have you ever had an experience when by simply telling yourself "I can do this" you suddenly felt the strength to push a little further? Look at me - enduring a deployment, when I literally told all of my army wife friends years before I even met Erik that I could NEVER do it. You guys - I'm starting to think Taylor Swift has it all wrong - you should NEVER say never.

Whether it is running a race, or simply navigating the race of life, it is incredibly admirable to see people who do not live in self-doubt but rather stride with faith, courage and confidence through challenging situations. It is not easy to achieve, but if we work on putting our minds in the right place, anything is possible. Those runners crossed the finish line. Whatever your finish line is - believe you can too, and you will find yourself on the other side having conquered the matter with the power of your mind, and hopefully enjoying a mimosa!

How to acheive world peace.

Wouldn't it be great if the world looked like THIS!

We live in a pretty volatile, power-hungry world. I cannot at this time give you specific examples, because as we discussed, I very rarely watch the news in an effort to preserve my Glinda the Good Witch means of transportation via bubble. But I was recently pondering what I could personally do to make the world a little less scary and a little more like the Epcot World Showcase (where fireworks and Mickey Mouse unite all countries). And I think I have discovered the answer - Dancing With the Stars, world leader style.

Hear me out-  it is no surprise that I am a super fan of the ABC hit that has been dancing into our living rooms since 2005. Admittedly, I make all of my decisions in life based on if they are going to bring me one step closer to becoming a B and/or C-list celebrity so that I can be on the show myself (and have five-time champion Derek Hough as my partner - duh). Not only is the entertaining judges, costumes, choreography and strategic use of the spray tan mind blowing, but this show CHANGES LIVES.

He definitely needs to get his grove on.

This season, Oympian Amy Purdy, who lost her legs at age 20, is inspiring people with her amazing story that you can do ANYTHING you set your mind to. All of the contestants endure this incredible journey to find themselves as they find their footing. Yes - tough, meaty sports stars are brought to tears. In fact EVERYONE that goes on this show at some point in time is bought to tears. Basically it's like being interviewed on Oprah every day for 12 weeks, on a dance floor in front of the whole world. All of the "fame" and "talent" that makes these people feel credible is stripped away before our eyes, and suddenly we witness true vulnerability and struggle that leads to ground-breaking and personal aha moments. Imagine if Kim Jong-un had this opportunity?! Am I right?!

And I have already considered all of the logistics. First of all - dance is universal so we wouldn't have to deal with language barriers. Yes, this is a bit of "friendly" competition, but the shift in focus from world domination to winning the mirror ball trophy will distract from any immediate world danger. They will all be way too busy picking out their costumes to start riots - something tells me world leaders care about fringe and sparkle. I'm telling you, get these power hungry politicians in the practice studio with people telling THEM what to do, on an even playing field learning to fox trot, and let the soul searching begin. After that, they can all get in a room and will likely decide that they were all just out of touch with what really matters and dancing was the answer all along.

Just a suggestion.

[PS - Please do not comment and or respond to this post with anything that remotely insinuates that you think I'm serious... Instead, channel that logical thinking into an old-school dance move and break it down!]

Foot. In. Mouth.

This is me. Except way less cute and delicate....

I had an epiphany at 10:27 PM last night as I was trying to fall asleep that what I actually meant to say in my post yesterday was that my finger TIPS were being torn to shreds by old guitar strings. Not to be confused with the made-up term I settled on "finger pads." Um. DUH.  That was a moment when stream of consciousness writing took precedence over appearing like a human who actually graduated elementary school.

So naturally, this got me to thinking about some other moments in my life in which I said things out loud that made absolutely no sense and/or should have just stayed in my head while in public ear shot of other human beings. I have a size 11 foot, so you would think the sheer terror of putting THAT appendage in my mouth would add an idiot-proof filter. But oh no... simply not the case. 

FOR INSTANCE:
[But first, a disclaimer: This is a place of no judgement. So you are required to still think I have a brain after you read it - okay?! Cool. Proceed:]

1. Yesterday to someone of our generation: "You mean to tell me you don't know the band Abba outside of their hit " Dancing Queen?!" Woah.  Not okay. You need to download their greatest hits album stat or else I'm not sure our friendship can continue."

2. To a young boy with long hair, dressed similarly to his younger sister in the sibling playroom at the children's hospital: "Well aren't you two sweet coordinated sisters!"

3. Along those same embarrassing lines, to a woman I completely misread from the backside entering the women's bathroom: "Oh sir - the men's is the other door!" (this one made me sick to my stomach for WEEKS. Needless to say, I held my pee and booked it out of there in shame).

4. To my boyfriend's amazing mom: "I just love that Erik is five years older than me - he will have to go through all of those milestones before me and I can be the young one!" - to which she sweetly replied with a giggle - "You do know I am five years older than Mike, right?"

5. To my sister who gained some pounds while she was studying abroad in Italy: "Lynnie, you don't look fat!! You look jolly! It's like, I can sort of see what you will look like when you're pregnant." She cried. 

And then the CLASSIC middle school (...it might have been high school, but whatever) questions I asked my Modern European teacher: "Um, wait - do people actually live in Egypt today?!" Followed up a few weeks later with - "What I don't understand is why the Romans never cleaned up the ruins - I mean, we clean up our disasters... why did they just let it sit there!?"

There you have it folks. Makes "finger pads" look like a bright and shining moment, doesn't it? Just goes to show your hair color, SAT score, GPA, income, title at your job or perfectionist personality does not guarantee you won't say stupid things, out loud, and in my case - relive them on the internet with my entire friend-base.

Then again - laughing at yourself can sometimes be exactly what you need to remember we are ALL human, and perhaps inspire you to have a little more grace for all of the humans around us (who might say stupid shit sometimes). It takes guts to be silly, and own up to those times when you didn't quite use your six senses (or even just one sense) to assess a situation. Be kind to others. Be kind to yourself. Embrace that you're not perfect, and more importantly NEVER ASSUME SOMEONE'S GENDER. Ever.

Be inspired.

"Cause you're EVERYWHERE TO ME"

I have had a set of guitar strings sitting in a cabinet since October 2012 - when, after two years of shredding my finger pads (finger pads?! That sounds like I have paws or something... I am clearly not up on my Grey's Anatomy...just go with it) with worn out strings, I decided it was time for a switch up.

The six strings came tightly raveled in this cute little case (I'm sure most elite guitarists would agree it is a "super cute" little case) and I was excited to find the tiny pliers from my hot pink Barbie tool kit, YouTube "how to re-string a guitar," and reignite my passion for playing (anonymously in my apartment of course. In this town you don't announce you play guitar if you have a voice made for musical-theater in the shower and your best tunes are Michelle Branch covers... it just doesn't quite "wow" music city, ya know?!).

But in the whirlwind of life (and sadly, without the proper pliers - THANKS FOR NOTHING BABS), my guitar sat in my living room corner, a finger death trap just collecting dust. Until yesterday. For those of you, like me, who aren't on the "math train" - that is OVER A YEAR - whaaa?!?!

So what changed? Why now?

This deployment has been such a grueling yet enlightening experience. In so many ways the 20-something woman's quest for love, booze and social fulfillment takes precedence over quality time with ourselves and our passions (you might be the self-actualized exception to this rule and if so - my sincere admiration). It is easy to lose ourselves when trying to "find" someone else. But when you have found "the one" and then he gets shipped off to a far far away magical and safe land called Afghanistan, the idle time and loneliness of watching Full House re-runs in your apartment can become seriously depressing. You start to ask yourself questions like - Who am I? and How can I find my own sense of fulfillment and happiness all by myself?

Okay, before you cue up the Celine Dion power ballad - hear me out. I have tons of amazing and supportive friends, all in different stages of life who have been such a life-line through this "unique" experience (just trying to get some points for being positive here). But those quiet moments alone, uninterrupted by the haze of hangovers, new flings or crazy nights out on the town, truly illuminate where we are missing the connection with ourselves. I had let that guitar just sit in the corner, and in doing so forgot about the love story I share with music and the love story I share with myself.  

Whatever your "guitar" is - that thing you have been putting off because you don't feel like you're good enough, you don't have the time, or you just don't know where to start - find some "pliers," (or in my case, a friend who knew what the heck to do) some courage and some time. Do the things you love - even if that means dancing alone in your living room (or singing Wicked in the shower... just a suggestion). You just might find the things you love bring you someone to love, a job to love, or even better, allow you to fall in love with yourself all over again.

Things I do not believe in.

This looks like a blast, right?!

Without any kind of eloquent introduction, today we are going to talk about things I do not believe in, because you know what - it just feels like a good day to get real with you about these things. This way, in the event you DO believe in these things, we don't end up in an awkward conversation where I have to do the "smile and nod" to be polite as you rave about your 15 miles on the treadmill / park trail (for example). So let's dig in...

1. Indoor cardio machines - Listen, I know cardio is great for your heart and endorphins are internal happy fairies awakening your inner Pharrell Williams. I know sometimes we end up in an eternal winter (no, this does NOT just happen in Disney movies...this happens in Nashville) and sometimes you need to sweat it out on a hamster-wheel. I get it. All I'm saying is - if it didn't exist, I wouldn't cry about it.

SERIOUSLY LADY. LAY OFF...

2. Winter in April - The saying goes "April showers bring May flowers." SHOWERS is the key word in this phrase... not to be confused with FREEZING RAIN and/or SNOW. And you know what? If April sunshine brought May weeds... I would totally be okay with that. I really would.

3. Pity parties lasting longer than 30 seconds - This is a new rule I have recently established in my life to try to get off the bitch train after 30 seconds of fussing about whatever it is that is making my inner Pharrell Williams cry. That means if I find myself on a treadmill, I'm only allowed to hate the world for 30 seconds (which is why I usually only stay on there for 29...).

4. Outdoor cardio of the sprinting variety - What is better than a walk, jog, skip or frolick in the lovely sunshine?! Cheese and Celine Dion are pretty much the only exceptions here. But it would probably take someone chasing me while not-equipped with my key-chain pepper spray for this to become anything close to a sprint. I believe in joint-protection and being able to breathe.

We don't talk like you.. ever

5. The show Nashville - Just... everything happening here is all wrong. For all of my shared sentiments on this, check out this brilliant post from Brittney McKenna.

"I OWN YOU. DON'T FORGET IT."

6. Monograms - Sorority girls everywhere are about to riot against me but there is a time and a place to tout your pride for your initials. In my opinion, it does not exist on every single thing you own. A towel here and there - awesome. But if you have a desire to tattoo your body with your initials, people are just going to think you have a habit of forgetting your own name....I'm just saying.

7. Grain-free bread - Sounds like winter in April, doesn't it?! Well, I am trying to domesticate myself a bit more while E is off saving the world and part of this includes trying new recipes. As you guys know already, I am not exactly graceful in the kitchen. But a friend of mine told me about "grain-free bread" and I thought - hey, why not! Let me just tell you now - there are SO MANY reasons why not. I don't think even Harry Potter could make separated eggs, cream cheese and spices into bread...

8. One-upping - As we discussed last week, everyone is going through something, and I think "to each their own," is a mantra that is far too easily ignored these days. When you are super duper hungry, on the verge of HANGRY, do you want someone reminding you that there are children starving in Africa? Probably not. Let everyone feel what they feel  (so long as they don't feel that grain-free bread is delicious. If they feel that - smack them) and revisit #3 when you think you have it worse. 

I will love you forever. Come what may.

9. Dairy intolerance - Listen, if you have it - POWER THROUGH. Nothing should keep you from cheese... NOTHING.

10. Bad timing - Of course we all have experienced our bouts of bad luck. But I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. In the days or even months when you feel like God is playing a joke on you, you have lost hope, or you find yourself chained to the toilet after indulging in some cheese, just remember you are exactly where you are supposed to be (maybe if you weren't stuck in the bathroom you would have ended up on a TREADMILL!) - and everything will work out as it should. Until then, there is always that magical liquid that me and Jesus BOTH believe in - wine (goes great with the cheese.... just saying). 

Nashville's hidden treasures

Yep, this happens. So does controlling the urge to ask to babysit their kids.

I have a pretty legit obsession with Nashville. We all know it is one of the hottest cities right now (despite the disgusting winter we've had), but I think most of what I love about Music City is the off-the-beaten path gems I am still discovering, even after four years of living here.

Nashville is so much more than a tourist destination where you could potentially run into Keith Urban at a coffee shop... because let's get real, when you actually live here, you sign an imaginary social agreement that you will not stalk, gawk or try to awkwardly befriend celebrities in coffee shops - or anywhere. Ever. Period. A lot of outsiders do not quite understand this protocol - "No mom - we cannot go ask Nicole Kidman her skin-care regiment...BECAUSE MOM, it's NOT cool. Yes mom, being cool IS, in this case, important. MOM. THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING... PUT THE IPHONE AWAY..."

To me, Nashville is home. If you're looking to try something new or coming to visit and you'd like to know the places that whisper a subtle awesomeness that might not pop up on a googleable top ten list, then check out my list below of The Top Five Most Under the Radar Nashville Perks (in no particular order) - 

This can be your afternoon, minus the bulging skirt.

And if you're not a people person - this happens too.

1. Sevier Park [12 South Neighborhood & District] - It may not sound so in conversation, but in fact, Sevier Park is one of the most calming and welcoming spots to reconnect with nature and community. Grab Noah Calhoun (or the next best thing - the novel), a blanket, bottle of water (or a covert box of wine...), and prepare to be transported to a painting as you watch Nashvillian characters of all ages populate the rolling hills around you. There is a lovely plantation-style yellow house with green shutters at the peak of the park, trails for exploring, paved areas for biking and open grassy areas for frisbee games, all within walking distance of some of the most unique shops and renowned restaurants in town (yes - including the not so quietly popular Edley's BBQ , Josephine and Jeni's Icecream - all of which have lines out the door that rival Hillsboro's famous The Pancake Pantry). Oh, and let's not forget to mention you are literally across the street from gourmet popsicle heaven, Las Palatas. You don't need a novel to feel Gone with the Wind in this hidden gem.

2. The Corsair Brewery Artisan Taproom [Marathon Village] - I live and work literally a mile away from this historic craft beer brewpub attached to Nashville's first distillery since

Do not be deceived - not just for things with motors!

Prohibition, and I had no idea it even existed! This is a perfect underground happy hour spot to circle around the cozy bar with locals, or take one of their sixteen craft beers from microbreweries around the country to the outdoor patio, decorated with stringing lights. And if you're not a beer lover, their cider is TO DIE FOR. Tip: Go on a Tuesday or Wednesday for two for one drafts, and you might just forget you were even at work just hours before!

A perfect setting for my love affair with cheese.

3. Bella Napoli Pizzeria [Edgehill Village] - Okay, okay! I know most Nashvillian's know of this treasure - the first Neapolitan Style Pizzeria in Nashville, tucked back between the many store-fronts of the quaint Edgehill Village. But for those married to Soulshine or Desanos (or dare I say, Papa John's), you have to give the authentic flavors, presentation and charming ambiance of Bella Napoli's a try! Feast on one of owner Paolo Tramontano’s exquisite dishes crafted with ingredients imported from Naples and you may have a new favorite pizza place (my recommendation is the mouth-watering four-cheese blend of the Quattro Formaggi with a side of the red sauce for dipping - their red sauce is stupid good, and I have been known to spoon the leftovers into my mouth like soup... I'm just that classy). But, it goes beyond amazing flavors when you sit outside on the patio as the sun sets with a glass of red wine and enjoy the hums of Italian music floating in the spring air- it is hard not to feel as though you have been transported to a square abroad.

The best way to work off dinner - DANCING!

4. Mangia Nashville [Franklin] - Speaking of Italy, we cannot leave off the list one of my most favorite dining experiences for celebrating, meeting new people, and let's be honest - gaining the most deliciously worth it ten pounds in one sitting! And when I say "experience," I truly mean it - Mangia Nashville transforms Cool Cafe in Franklin into an authentically warm and charming Italian dining room only on Saturday nights. And, between each of the many delicious courses, the wait-staff, managers and Chef, play music, host dance lines and encourage everyone to celebrate amazing food among some of the most genuine and energetic company in town. Tip: You have to call ahead to make a reservation and your party is randomly sat at one of the long community tables to embark on a home-style Italian feast - so bring your friendliness in addition to your appetite! AND for those of you who know how to eat in moderation (myself excluded) you can ask for boxes to take some of the food home, so it can be the feast that keeps on giving!

I am all about a caffeinated good cause.

5. The Well Coffeehouse [Granny White Pike with a Brentwood location coming soon] - There are tons of coffee house options in Nashville (yes - some that even Keith Urban frequent...) but, The Well is truly special. It is a non-profit coffee house started by a group of friends who not only wanted to provide quality coffee and products to its community, but also to make a bold difference around the world. The Well donates a percentage of the profits to their two partners - Living Water Project and Blood:Water Mission - to provide clean water to the millions of people around the world in need. So the next time you are looking for a quiet place to read or reboot, check out The Well and pay it forward just by filling up your cup!

So there you have it friends! Some new places to check out around our lovely little town. And listen, if you know and love these places and think they are not so "under the radar," well then, I admittedly live under a rock - a true creature of habit, sometimes to a fault. But hopefully I have reached some Nashville newcomers or other rock dwellers out there who may need a change of pace and are sure to enjoy these many options right in our backyard.

Growing pains

Reason #456 I am not ready to own an animal.

I have two close friends who both got new puppies around the same time. I have followed their journeys of loving these new little creatures in their lives so unconditionally, oozing with stories of how much joy they bring. At the same time, these stories are often peppered with frustrations of adjustment. They went from being single and free to literally having a "child" (without a diaper, mind you) peeing, pooping, and generally biting everything in sight. Surely there are moments when they want to literally drop kick the things off a balcony (back off PETA, I mean this figuratively). But, they will work through the frustrations to shape the precious little devils into a friend and a companion - like Marley and Me (only the most emotional movie of all time, with the exception being Titanic - obviously) all in the name of love.

What I am learning through their experience is just how universal adjustment truly is. Despite the vast difference in potential subject matter - be it a new puppy, child, job, relationship, geographic move or grief, death, heartbreak, separation (the list goes on and on) - each change in our life's landscape involves navigating uncharted territory. Adjustment is a long, winding journey that shapes, grows and magnifies our strengths and weaknesses. It is exhausting in the most miserably beautiful way.

I am a person who likes to be in control. No, this does not make me a control "freak." I think the word "freak" is not a very nice word to call someone. Okay, fine. I'm a control freak (with the bizarre exception being I hate to drive, but that is probably because I feel more in control of the music from the passenger seat). But inevitably (and we have all been there) life throws you a "new puppy" and you have absolutely ZERO control over the crazy pooping, peeing, biting little angel (for those of you feeling a little lost, my puppy is named deployment).

You have to dig deep to find a unique kind of patience you didn't know even existed. You have to read books to prepare, change your way of thinking, shift your behavior - you have to essentially take your emotions to boot camp. And guess what - this control freak HATES BOOT CAMP. I have some legit hostility toward those big muscley meaty dudes / Jillian Michaels SCREAMING AT ME telling me to push through the pain to build a muscle I'm not entirely sure I even want! Unfortunately, some things in life require just that - to push through to get to the light at the end of the tunnel.

But the beautiful thing I am learning by hugging and laughing with my crazy friends just trying to sleep through the night with a new puppy, is that I am not alone. Life is one big roller coaster of adjustment, and we are all somewhere in the up or down season. Some hide their transition remarkably better than others. Some have post-it notes of positive mantras all over their desk at work to stay focused on the light at the end of the tunnel (don't assume that by "some" I mean me... I mean... okay. Fine. Yes... post-it notes are EVERYWHERE - but I'll tell you what, they are a lot less irritating than Jillian Michaels).

But regardless of how you deal with your growing pains, just remember, you're not alone, and even if the tunnel feels really freakin long, the light is there, waiting for you.